Beauty Tips for Ministers
Because you're in the public eye, and God knows you need to look good.
No Sneakers, Please!
April 21, 2009 on 8:22 pm | In Shoes (Gals), Shoes (Guys), The Naughty Corner | 7 CommentsLovely reader Gina sent this in,
I am not a minister but my minister turned me on to your blog and I am a devoted reader. Kudos for doing your part to stamp out frumpiness! To that end, I’d like to suggest a discussion about not wearing athletic sneakers unless you are actually working out. An explanation of a “non-athletic” sneaker for casual wear would be a public service!
Dear Gina,
Thank you for your letter and for your excellent suggestion. You reasonably suggest a “discussion” about wearing athletic sneakers outside of the gym, but PeaceBang is going to make this much easier although less democratic:
PEOPLE, UNLESS YOU’RE GOING TO THE GYM, DON’T WEAR SNEAKERS. THANK YOU.
Seriously, though. I am in the process of packing for a long trip abroad and anticipating with much dismay the sight of American tourists sightseeing in Big Wanking White Sneakers. On one hand, I’m grateful that anyone is lucky and solvent enough to travel. On the other, I think it sets U.S.-French relations back ever so much when we storm the Bastille (or the Louvre, or Notre Dame) in our big ole sneaks and baseball caps. There’s such a thing as Beauty, and it is revered as a transcendent reality in much of the world (the French, for example, are known for their devotion to it). So I for one am not about to visit the Hagia Sofia in a pair of Big Wanking Sneakers. Nor shall I defile the temple of Nike in a pair of Nikes. What I will do is wear black walking shoes that are like sneakers in comfort and construction but do not scream, “I’m From the USA Where Sloppiness Is Our Expression of Freedom!”
(One caveat: as far as PeaceBang is concerned, the very elderly may wear whatever they like on their feet when touring. That also goes for veterans. And probably some other special honored people I haven’t thought to include right now. But for those of us who are fairly hale and hearty and have options, let’s opt for something more appropriate that Big Wanking Sneakers.)
That goes for our ordinary, non-traveling lives, too. Sneakers are for the gym. And it’s really not beyond any of our capabilities to change shoes after a work-out. There are lots and lots of comfortable, foot and ankle-supporting shoe options out there. Even black sneakers are better than the Big Wanking White Ones.
As far as “non-athletic sneaker” for casual wear that Gina references, that would be something like this:
Very cute, very kicky, if that’s your thing (I don’t love the Asics for the guys in the top photo, but the Pumas for gals are right cute).
But this cute colorful kicks thing can get out of hand. I can just hear the “Bozo The Clown” theme when I look at these.
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I’d be interested to hear your take generally on packing shoes for travel. Shoes are always my bete noir (which would be a good name for a shoe brand, really) in trying to pack light, yet allow for contingencies of weather, unexpectedly dressy events, etc. I can never get by with fewer than three pair–and I’m NOT one of those women who has a different pair of shoes for every outfit. PeaceBang, share with us your shoe-packing wisdom!
[That's such a toughie. It depends so much on where you'll be going and why! For winter-fall-early spring in NYC, for instance, I tend to stick with a pair of great boots for everything, plan my outfits around them, and just bring a pair of light clogs for walking around the hotel or quick trips to the corner store. For other trips, I try to keep the shoes lightweight and three pairs max. On this five-week trip for instance, I am taking a pair of Teva sandals for hot-weather walking or beach, a pair of dressy flat sandals for nights out in Turkey and Greece, black sneakerish walking shoes, and a pair of black flats for Transylvania, where sandals didn't feel appropriate for church. I bought a pair of really cute orange Keenes that weigh nothing and that are really comfortable to walk in, but I just know I'll never use them. So they're staying home. I'll bring them to Nicaragua. I allow myself four pairs of shoes if I'm going away for longer than a month; otherwise, two or three. It's not silly to plan outfits around the shoes rather than the other way around. Shoes are bulky and can take up a surprising amount of space. Edit, edit, edit! - PB]
Comment by Miss Conduct — April 22, 2009 #
I spent an embarrassing amount of time contemplating this question for my last trip.
I have super-wimpy feet that need loads of support or I simply DIE. I found some very nice black suede sneaks at Easy Spirit (cannot find now on their website, grr) and added athletic inserts from the drug store. With longish black pants they were non-frumpy enough.
I also brought my totally frumpella big, white wankers for days I knew we’d be walking 3-4 miles at a clip. Having never been on a group tour where they had me walking more in one day than I’d ever covered in my life, I was surprised by how easily I gave in to them. They were Big White Wanking Shoes of Mercy.
Comment by Rev. Gidget — April 22, 2009 #
If you are British, wanking sneakers are anything but frumpy. (Wanking is a UK term for masturbation.) Reading this post made me giggle a little.
Wanking sneakers in the Louvre are just an invitation to being arrested and checking out the inside of a French police station AND giving Americans a whole new kind of rep. [You got a big wicked cackle out of me, Kate! What a riot! - PB]
Comment by Kate — April 23, 2009 #
With regard to non-athletic trainers (sneakers) may I introduce you to the wonderful Veja.
They’re fair trade and organic and helping rainforest dwellers in Brazil.
I wore these
http://www.adili.com/Catalogue/20510011/Women/Veja-Volley_White_Women%27s_Trainer.aspx
round Budapest and Vienna recently.
(I wore my fab Timberland knee high boots round Istanbul earlier this year. Amazing city, you are so going to love it)
Comment by Cal — April 24, 2009 #
My understanding is that this is not only a fashion issue–if you are running or doing some other serious workout, your shoes for this purpose need to “rest”. Seriously. I guess it could compromise the support they provide if you wear them constantly.
Of course I went to a conference last week and forgot to pack anything else, so there you go. . . .
Comment by Madgebaby — May 13, 2009 #
Shoes are that one thing that makes every traveler fret. My own personal experience in packing for a long trip in a foreign land was this: I packed a pair of light weight Pumas-wore them all of half a night. No traction! I quite literally took them off and walked around Manger Square in my socks… kinda ew but much better than the 4 times I slipped and busted various parts of my anatomy. My salvation were the shoes I wore on the plane. I wore a pair of black loafers (since it allowed for easy on/off at airports) for the rest of my trip. Looked great with my black pants (which is all I took) and I even climbed Mt. Sinai in them! Nary a slip or fall and feet were comfy the whole time. I must say though, while huffing and puffing my way up the mountain I was passed by a Russian tourist wearing stilettos. I.Kid.Not. Now that’s some shoe love.
Comment by Divine Miss M — August 24, 2009 #
Hehe, I’ve been loving this site, Rev. PB, and felt the need to reply to this one.
I’m a novice priestess in a small but historic Daoist denomination. Typically one wears the traditional Chinese black mary-jane “cloth shoes” which are casual-to-nice for persons of any persuasion, in ritual or day wear. These, or Buddhist-style sandals, are the usual for many Daoist clergy. (Though technically “ten-direction shoes” are formal for Daoist clergy, they’re rather hard to find or make.) Black cloth shoes are modest and dignified.
But more and more Daoist priests may be seen wearing bright white sneakers under vestments. Truly and glaringly hideous. Imagine traditional “high church” Roman Catholic or Greek Orthodox robes combined with Adidas and you get the drift. It’s one thing to wear such during private rituals when laity aren’t present. But to think that footwear doesn’t matter, ironically may end up actively calling atention to one’s feet during public services. It ends up being very immodest.
Footwear have ritual import, same as any other ritual tool. It makes one look down (to Earth) when one ought look up (to Heaven.) I can’t imagine the ritual aesthetics for Christians would differ that much on this score(?).
Comment by Shufei — September 10, 2009 #