Because you're in the public eye, and God knows you need to look good.

Posts by PeaceBang

Packing For Conferences

May23
2013 2 Comments Written by PeaceBang

I can’t find the e-mail right now (this is a theme with me lately, oui?) but I know that one of my little lambs just wrote a long, frustrated letter asking for help packing for our General Assembly. It was much like a letter I got not long before the Festival Of Homiletics asking essentially the same question: “What’s the dress code?”

Let’s keep this as simple as possible.

If you’re presenting, dress to the top of your game, which means to the most polished and beautiful version of your public image. If that’s Social Justice Earth Mother, make sure your flowy skirts are a lovely fabric and fit well. Get your hair trimmed to get rid of any stragglies. Get a pedicure and wear sandals, but nice sandals. If your public leader image is Corporate Power Pastor, wear a great suit and wingtips. Work it. Shave and get your hair did. Get a man manicure and buff your nails. If your public leader image is Hipster Church and Social Media Maven, wear a jacket without a tie. Get a hair cut. Find some really snappy shoes. Make sure you’re impeccably groomed no matter how cool you want to appear.

If you’re a conferee who is not presenting and not interviewing, dress for a day at the office. We’ve talked enough here about how to dress that you should know by now how to dress comfortably but still neatly, and like a grown-up. I personally LOVE seeing my colleagues so much better dressed than they were fifteen years ago — it warms the cockles of my heart to see such beauty and care among us. I love seeing some of my younger pigeons in sports jackets and dresses, looking all fine. It makes me very happy and I think it reflects well on our religious communities when we are nicely dressed at conferences. It shows respect for self and others.

But given that suitcases now cost $25 to put on the bloody plane, I encourage all of us to find ways to pack simply and lightly. If that means obsessing for a month about exactly which pair of pants to take, it’s probably worth the agony. I myself just booked conference travel between Boston and Louisville with very short connections that will have me running to make my flights. I may very well limit myself to a carry-on and just kiss my cute shoes goodbye as they sit this one out. After the spring I’ve had I’ll just be happy to sit around in a very boring outfit with comfortable shoes and listen to other people with interesting things to say. If you forced me to pack right now I bet I’d throw in white pants and black pants, a navy blazer and a couple of cardigans, a pair of oxfords and a pair of sandals, skip all the contact lens solution and all the hair products and say, “Here I am. I just got through Candidating Week,bought a house by myself, said farewell to my congregation of ten years and started to pack up the parsonage. This is as good as it gets.”

But of course I will make every attempt to at least have cute accessories. A girl can’t completely let herself go!

Posted in General Assembly/Conferences

Am I Meeting With a Presbyterian Woman’s Group in Western NY in Late September?

May22
2013 3 Comments Written by PeaceBang

Dearlings, please help an old girl out.

I spoke many months with one of you who e-mailed to ask if I would come work with your woman’s group near Buffalo, NY. At the time I knew I would be in transition and I said that the date sounded fine but that we should check back later to firm things up, as I had no idea where I would be living or working then.

I have just received an invitation to speak at an Installation in mid-October and I have a commitment not to accept more than one out-of-town professional engagement per quarter.

If you’re the pigeon who has first dibs, it would be wonderful to hear from you. I apologize that I can’t find our e-mail conversation no matter what filters I use, and my calendar simply says, “Consult Buffalo Presbies” on September 30.

I know it’s only May but you know how it is. We book early around here.

Much love and thanks, PB

Posted in PeaceBang PR and Appearances

Styling Clericals #4

May21
2013 4 Comments Written by PeaceBang

The Rev. Dr. Wil Gafney styles her clericals with a yellow suit with statement broach for a rector’s anniversary.

Click images to enlarge.
photo 1-1

photo 2-3

This is beautiful, elegant, entirely professional, dignified and celebratory. This is a clergywoman who knows who she is, knows how to dress for a special occasion, and has the whole thing put together from head to toe. Brava.

A few things about reading this image: I am struck by the interplay of influences here. First and foremost, she is a lady-like in a beautiful daffodil yellow suit, and pointy heels. The jewelry is also traditionally feminine. However: note the harmonious inclusion of decidedly contemporary elements such as Wil’s nose ring and sunglasses and very modern, sexy hair. The combined effect is striking. As a traditionalist, I love it. As a contemporary, strong woman, I love it. I privately call this look “Lady Leader,” and it’s a joy to see it done so beautifully.

Posted in Clergy Image, PeaceBang Halo Of Praise, Styling Outfits Tips, Vestments And Clericals, What To Wear To Rites of Passage

The Rev. Rosemary Bray McNatt On Race, Class And Image

May20
2013 4 Comments Written by PeaceBang

Wonderful e-mail just now from former student and current colleague, Rev. Lisa Bovee Kemper, who comments here frequently.

Hi, Vicki! I happened to read Rosemary Bray-McNatt’s memoir recently, and discovered the following passage, which is such a beautiful articulation of why and how presentation matters–and as I read it, I could hear similar words come out of your mouth. It’s also a really good concrete example of how class, gender & race impact the issue and articulates the “feminist” argument that caring about what we look like is kowtowing to the patriarchy, which, if you ask me, is entirely untrue.

“At the debate that night, Mrs. Schlafly faced Karen DeCrow, who showed up in jeans and a shirt, living up to every stereotype of feminists ever created. I was always a low maintenance woman, myself, and agreed with the notion that looks were often irrelevant. But for me, the operative word was often. I was also an African-American woman who knew that what you wore, how you fixed your hair, even your shoes telegraphed a host of messages. I would never have appeared before a public body in jeans and a shirt to debate an important political issue. Where I came from, the way you dressed was a respect issue: I would have been representing my people as well as myself, and how I looked would matter to those for whom I hoped to speak. For me personally, the way I dressed would also be a strategic issue. I would never allow an audience to be distracted from my message because they were too busy wondering why I didn’t put on appropriate clothes.” (from Unafraid of the Dark by Rosemary L. Bray, p. 166)

Amen and amen!!! Thanks, Lisa. I loved Rosie’s autobiography and you’ve reminded me that it’s high time to give it another read.

Posted in Clergy Image, Theological Reflection On Your Fabulousness

Florida City Pastor

May20
2013 7 Comments Written by PeaceBang

Pastor J. wants some advice! He writes,

Hi Victoria,
I’m a [Protestant] pastor, age XX, down in Florida, south of XX. I’m planning on hitting the streets this summer in an area that is low education and low income … we might consider inner city. I would like to look professional. Can I wear a collar with shorts and sandals? Remember it is beastly hot here! Also I’m wondering about a hat. Father Sarducci always wore one! I know you don’t do men’s fashion, but i don’t know anyone to ask who might have some fashion sense! Any advise would be appreciated … and I understand if you’re busy or just plain stumped by the question!

Blessings, J.

Dear J.,

Watch out for ‘GATORS! They’re HUGE down there. I’ve seen them with my own eyes. Do not — I repeat — do NOT attempt to evangelize the alligators.
Now, whattya mean, I don’t “do” men’s fashion? Of course I do! Not nearly as often as I advise women clergy, but there’s a whole bunch of archives for my fellas! Just go to the pull-down menu of categories and feast your eyes on my Tips for the Menfolk of the Cloth.

Now for your question.

Yes, I think it’s okay to wear shorts in the climate you’re describing, if not ideal. If you go that route, make sure to get walking shorts in khaki or black and wear them with black clericals. The key to looking professional in shorts is to be very well groomed. This means a good hair-cut, legs and feet that aren’t scaly and dry, and shorts that aren’t flappy and wrinkled but that look respectable (and worn with shirt tucked in and a nice belt). Do consider that men who live in very hot climates do NOT wear shorts, but loose cotton trousers, and consider researching some of those options. I think you could look really great in white cotton or linen pants and huaraches, with a Panama hat, but I’ve never seen you and I don’t know your style.

Here’s a really helpful article about dressing for hot weather. This guy makes a lot of good points.

Let’s look at some garments and discuss. Click on the images to enlarge:

This is a clean and handsome look, but not very professional to my eye. See how the shorts are too sporty and boyish? They seem just a bit too short. Again, very handsome, but not priestly.

Screen shot 2013-05-20 at 7.08.24 PM

Please do not wear cargo shorts on the job. They’re great for all the pockets, but they’re a mess of wrinkles and floppiness once you have them on.

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A lot of men in hot climates wear drawstring pants. I don’t think they’d work with clericals but certainly for the times you’re not in your collar, a crisp pair of white cotton drawstring pants and a linen shirt with huaraches can keep you cool and presentable.

Screen shot 2013-05-20 at 7.11.49 PM

These are huaraches, in case you were wondering:

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And this is the aforementioned Panama hat:

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This is actually a really nice look for a casual day of walking around. You’ve got the black walking shorts, a great pair of classic canvass sneaks, and your clericals. Get a nice pair of sunglasses and you’d be sharp!

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This is a look that makes me tremble with fear and horror. It’s all business upstairs, all Dorks Galore downstairs.

bermudasocks

THOU SHALT NOT WEAR SOCKS WITH THY SHORTS.

And again, just to give you the full force of how very irredeemable this is:

BermudaShorts01

I’d really recommend that you try to find some nice linen twill chinos. Also, try to be as handsome as this male model, as it will greatly enhance your ability to bring the gospel to Floridians. Just kidding, J! Thanks for writing and send me some photos of yourself in full Rev. City Gator Mode.

Screen shot 2013-05-20 at 7.29.15 PM

Posted in Men's Clothing, Styling Outfits Tips, Tips For The Menfolk
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BTFM is an independent on-line ministry of the Rev. Dr. Victoria Weinstein.