My homey, Ann Coulter, had a rip-snorting time at CPAC today, making headlines for brilliant remarks like the ones that follow:
“The reason liberal women are liberal is because they have to date liberal men. As we’ve seen—from Bill Clinton and Dominique Strauss-Kahn and Anthony Weiner—we see how liberal men treat women.”
She added, “If I were stuck with them, I’d be angry too. And I’ll take 69 cents on the dollar, or whatever the current feminist myth is about how much we make, just to never have to pay for dinner. That seems like a fair deal to me.” – Ann Coulter
So here she is, with a really interesting public image on display. Let us analyze. Click images to enlarge.
This was the first image I saw, provided by Gawker. My first and quick “read” was “Oh my God, Ann, what’s up with the streetwalker fashion?” I was concerned. I really am. Coulter and I were in high school together and while we didn’t know each other (I don’t think we did — she might have seen me play Marty in “Grease” that year, since it seemed that practically the whole school attended), we’re New Canaan girls and NCHS grads stick together. Go, Rams! Pretty much everything Ann C. utters makes me want to tackle her on our home football field, but she’s doing her thing and I’m doing mine, and isn’t it interesting that our little school had both of us walking its halls at the same time? God BLESS America.
The long, ratty, bleached blonde porn fantasy girl hair is depressing. It screams, “I refuse to age gracefully!” So does this make-up job:
The “black buttered eyeballs” (Cintra Wilson’s hilarious description of this kind of raccoon eye) are very in with the young set, and I think it would look fine if Ann was going dancing. In fact, her whole ensemble would be fine if she was going clubbing, and in fact, the very idea reminds me of this hilarious scene from “Knocked Up” (which you shouldn’t watch in the church office with the sound up).
If Ann wants to work a “sexy conservative polemicist” thing at 50, she is more than capable of doing so. But this just looks desperate. Frankly, she should follow someone like Sarah Palin for inspiration if she wants to go that route (except with better hair). Coulter is long and lanky, and just showing a bunch of skin isn’t the way to project a strong, sexy image. In fact — and this is treading sensitive territory as I am not into body shaming — because she lacks muscle tone and appears so thin as to be gaunt, I wind up worried about her health rather than admiring her fierce feminine awesomeness.
The proportions of her boots and skirt are so off, if she was one of my pigeons I’d pull her aside and send her up to her hotel room to change into pumps. The skirt is inappropriately short for a formal professional engagement — not to mention WAY too tight — but the way to remedy that isn’t to wear boots that cut her off at that extremely weird place mid-calf.
She also looks under-dressed in terms of warmth and propriety. I don’t mean just that she’s showing too much skin and that makes her look desperate and insecure, I mean she looks chilly and hungry. All in all, I think she’s at a bad place in the evolution of her public image and I sympathize. I’d love to take her on as a client. If she wants to look hot and fierce she can do it, but this isn’t the way.
No idea you went to high school with Ann Coulter. What a funny coincidence and I would imagine this earns you some rather peculiar bragging rights among your colleagues! ;). She is a physically beautiful attractive woman and someone should indeed help her modernize that look!
She does look thin – and fragile. It’s a big discomforting, too, to have a woman who no doubt sees herself as a leader and public thinker wearing clothes that make her look so sexually available and vulnerable, rather than strong, professional, and as you say, fierce!
I’d rather someone modernize her thinking….
I agree, some of the conservative women rock the strong, sexy look-Condoleezza Rice as well as Sarah Palin. I am inwardly conflicted whenever I catch myself wanting to imitate their style. Good on you for wanting to help Coulter out.
But I’m not even sure her ridiculous quote is internally consistant. [I thought the same thing. But why make sense when you can make headlines!? – PB] Oh well. Less offensive than the white nationalism at CPAC. [
LOL!
You used the words: “Hot and fierce..” and “Ann Coulter” in the same sentence! [I DID! Listen, I think she’s abhorrent, but I’m always on the look-out for opportunities to study image and to ask, “What does this communicate non-verbally? – PB]
This person has no credibility in my world;
she wants to preach, and wave a finger about, and judge and make waves.. and instead she garners ridicule. It only makes the conservative movement even more bizarre.
You are such a gracious dear even considering taking her on as a client; she needs a good shake-up!
How fun you are from New Canaan, I am from Stamford. I already liked your style, now you get extra points from me. I suppose I have to fight my frumpiness harder now. [Merritt Parkyway! Woo Hoo! – PB]
Last time I saw a woman wearing boots like that, it was at a science-fiction convention. She was 18-20 years old, and dressed as Supergirl.
Ann Coulter is one of the most hateful people currently in the public eye. It’s fine with me if she continues to dress in a way that makes her look ridiculous and lose credibility – she doesn’t deserve any. [Indeed! Or, to dress and present in a way that highlights her essential, inner ugliness. – PB]
Not to mention the skanky hair extensions.
I’ve always wondered if Ann Coulter has Marfans with her long lanky look and large hands and face. She is an odd looking woman and could dress very powerfully but instead wears unflattering looks. In my experience, her politics shriek so much louder than her appearance, it’s hard to focus on the wardrobe.
I really appreciate the tenor of this post. As a passionate liberal (and, I’ll own up to it, a passionately partisan Democrat), it’s very easy for me to completely demonize conservatives, especially the public conservatives like Coulter who are essentially just political performance artists. So I appreciate the effort to avoid body shaming and to assess her public image and appearance objectively, as well as not saying she looks like “a tranny,” a comment I see all the time on liberal blogs.