Ooh, Sarah K.’s gonna be reading on Christmas Eve and she was requested to wear white on top and black on bottom. She’s not psyched about it, and why should she be?
Eeek! Unless you’re a real slimmy, that combo just cuts you RIGHT IN HALF like a magician’s assistant and who needs that? If I was asked to wear that combination I would probably just have to show up in all black and say, “Whoops, I forgot about the ‘white on top’ part!”
The worst iteration of this combo is the heavy-bosomed gal or hefty guy in a white blouse/shirt tucked into black pleated pants. It makes me want to draw the poor individual aside and yell, “WHY DID YOU DO THAT TO YOURSELF ON PURPOSE?”
At least guys have a tie to break up the two color blocks and add some visual interest (not to mention a sports coat that ALWAYS helps one look handsomer) but gads, what’s a woman to do? I wouldn’t recommend adding a festive scarf tied in front, as that always looks like a Campfire Girl. It’s just not leadership wear, Reverend Chicas. It really isn’t. At least add a blazer if you’re going to go that direction and then you’ll be fine.
Unless you’re a waitress, a chorister, or a … I don’t know, you tell me… you can do so much better for yourself that white blouse, black skirt or pants. If you’re being requested to don this gay apparel, consider two guidelines:
1. Stay away from button blouses and find a fitted white V-neck sweater or something with more shape to it. By fitted, I don’t mean “tight.” I mean something with more shape to it. Wear a tummy slimmer if you need to.
2. If you’re wearing white, PLEASE make sure to wear some make-up so you don’t look like death. Don’t over-bronze or get orangey. Just some coverage of blotchy skin, some blush and a bit of lippy.
3. Women, consider ivory or a more forgiving shade than stark white. Gentlemen, stick to stark white. God forbid you wear BEIGE. *shudder*
4. Burn all of your pleated pants right now.
I’m in a choir whose main mission is not performances (it’s bedsides), but when we are asked to do something as a larger group, we wear black bottoms and “jewel-tone tops”.
Maybe the requestors just need to hear that suggestion for the future.
How about this – black top and bottom, with long, white cashmere (or good fake) scarf? Black top & bottom, big white shawl.
You don’t have to do the square knot scarf — you could wear a long oblong scarf like a stole or do that lopped knot that’s popular these days… or a really smashing piece of jewelry at the neck that will draw everyone’s attention up to your gawjus face.
Please, may I change into some other pants before I burn the pleated ones? OK, I obviously missed the memo on the pants, so I’ll have to ask why? Is it becuase when they are not sharply creased and pleated they can look sloppy?
Is nobody else mortified at the idea of someone being “requested” to wear something for worship? Unless it’s the children’s Christmas program I find that in poor taste. It’s WORSHIP, not performance. Which is not to say that we aren’t conscious of how others “read” the experience. It’s not to say that we’re not completely prepared and ready to offer the absolute best that we have to give. It’s not to say that we don’t dress in a way that is appropriate to the gravity of the occasion. But it’s WORSHIP friends.
I’m with you PB, black bottoms and white tops = waitress! And those colours don’t suit many of the folks who wear them…
The only way you can get away with something like this is to really rock the black and white accessories i.e. black patent leather belt and shoes, maybe lots and lots of big pearls, the white scarf is a good idea or a black and white patterned scarf if allowed?
I think a full-figured woman could get away with a crisp white blouse (UNTUCKED, with a nice finished bottom hem) and a bias-cut skirt hitting just below the knee.
But since most of us aren’t in a position to shop for an outfit in which to spend 90 seconds reading a lesson in church, I agree with the overall principle of the thing.
Why hello, Peace Bang, what a pleasant surprise this morning to see you chatting about my unpleasant wardrobe dilemma!
Some more context for folks:
A: About moi. I am a layperson (pre-seminarian, applying this winter!), I’m a young-looking 26, and yes, I am unfortunately of the busty variety. No button-front tops for me!
B: The specific wardrobe is because I have offered to sing as a carol leader for one of our multiple services on Christmas eve, and we have gorgeous new choir stoles from Transylvania that we apparently will wear (they are a festive red and white!). And since it’s Christmas Eve, we wouldn’t do jewel tones, unfortunately (our choir director HAS done that in the past, though!).
C: I have a gorgeous black dress that I might just cover with a white twinset sweater for the singing service (I am doing only readings at one of the other services).
Thank you all for the supportive thoughts, and for the advice, Peace Bang! I need to do a few test-runs with my closet later this week; I’ll try to grab a photo of the Final Result, as well.
I think the black dress with white sweater is a great idea. It gets the idea across while remaining attractive!
The funny part about this whole conversation — I serve a congregation that has lots of folks from all around the globe as well as a “root” group of NE Yankees, and I invited people to wear something that was “traditional holiday” wear for them to Christmas Eve. I specified that it could be out of their cultural/ethnic background or something that was traditional for their family celebrations.
I’m really looking forward to what people will wear, but I was pondering my own dilemna — I’m a “Heinz 57” American with no ethnic cultural background other than 1950’s-60’s White Suburbia. Then it occurred to me, that we DID have a Christmas tradition! A velvet skirt (black, red, or green) and a white blouse! Fortunately, I’ll be wearing the robe, so no one will really see it…:>)
…I keep reading about the horrors of pleated pants, but I miss them being around. I find that they flow from my rather-large stomach to my not-very-large-at-all legs without giving me the sumo-wrestler-diaper look. It’s a smoother transition. (So I wear skirts a lot.)
OTOH, I never, ever wear white. Not just because I’m way overendowed on top but because it looks horrible on me!