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Modest AND Glammy: It Can Be Done!

Oh, le sigh! PeaceBang is always so inspired and enchanted when she sees a gal who knows how to accomplish elegant, formal, beautemous AND modest in one fell swoop. In this world of Cleavage Abuse and leggings as formalwear (do not doubt your Auntie PeaceBang, she saw this happen JUST LAST NIGHT at an event!), and TTS (Too Tight and Shiny), it is such soul nurturing goodness to be served up elegance and appropriateness.

This lovely Sister of The Groom I met at a recent wedding is Muslim and therefore committed to a certain decorum in her style of dress. She explained to me that her gorgeous and creative wrap was simply a chiffon scarf tied in the back and secured in the front with — you should pardon the expression — boob tape. I don’t know what else you call it. It’s what they use in Hollywood to keep lady stars from having wardrobe malfunctions. I don’t know where one obtains boob tape but I’m sure one of my devoted pigeons can enlighten us on the subject.

Et voila! Here we have a fairly low-cut cocktail dress, but no Festival of Inappropriate Sharing!

So pretty, right?

Ah, ancient Chinese secret!* Secured at the shoulders with boob tape:

Draped at the neck just so, and she’s ready to enjoy the evening without overt displays of bazoom. Great styling tip.


Thank you, Aadila, for giving me permission to share your beautiful photos and styling idea!

* Ten extra points if you get this 1970’s pop culture reference!

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One Bold Thing

I like to wear classics like a navy blazer and striped top. After all, I did grow up in New Canaan, Connecticut and some of that has undoubtedly rubbed off on me. But I’m not a preppy type in the least, so if I go slightly prep, I always do slightly more dramatic make-up and style myself with at least one bold accessory that adds a touch of Bohemia (I’m Slovak by heritage, and Bohemia isn’t literally far off!).

Have fun with your details.

This photo of me is my property. Please do not post or share without my permission. Thank you.

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Oxfords

Gals, you’re in luck if you hate heels. Oxfords are all the rage lately. They’re comfy and fashionable. Here are some ideas for styling.

I’m have a few pairs myself, and adore them:

I found these vintage Fluevogs on e-bay and have been wearing them all the time this fall with trousers, a white blouse, cardigan and scarf.

It’s against my religion to wear sneakers in public. These are as comfy as it gets without resorting to athletic shoes. The soles are primo. Any flats I wear have to have some sort of bulk to them or else my feet look too tiny to hold up my meatball bod. Proportion, darlings!

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Rev. Boyfriend Has An Interview!

Got this today from a frantic pigeon,

Here’s the scoop:

I’ll be flying in to [undisclosed location] this weekend for a final interview; a member of the search committee is planning to meet me at the airport and shuttle me to my hotel (at which point I’ll have the evening to myself……. PAR-TAY [just kidding]). So I need to look quasi-fabulous at the gate, right? But I also don’t want to overdo it, as I’ll only actually be seen by this individual for about 15 minutes.

Any shirt to be tucked in will inevitably appear frumpy post-flight. So do I don a sweater? Can I get away with nice jeans? Just for the flight?

But then for the interview/dinner the next day — what then?!!! A suit feels like total overkill. Do I go for a more subdued, professorial vibe? Bust out my grey tweedish sport coat? With chinos? Or slacks? Tie necessary, or can I get away with just a lightweight v-neck sweater?

Like, what communicates pastoral authority but also a penchant for original expression? Something that says I’m sophisticated and brainy, but not pompous? This congregation is kind of quirky but still pretty highbrow, so I need to toe a meticulous line. No pressure, eh?

HELP ME, PLEASE!!!!

I love my pigeons. They’re so funny and articulate! So here’s how I responded:

Congratulations on your interview!
To your question: you’ve got it, babe:

1. Fly in and arrive in your tweedy jacket, a button-down shirt and jeans. Your sports coat won’t get wrinkled in transit and you’ll be comfortable and sharp. Just make sure your shoes are neat and you’re not looking beat up. You need to be fresh as a little daisy when you shake that first hand.

2. For the interview and dinner, I honestly think you could do a suit, but only if you are comfortable being overdressed. I sort of love being overdressed for interviews. It’s like, “This is how I dress to meet super important people, and you [the committee] make the grade no matter what YOU’RE wearing.” Like, if I was meeting Ghandi and he was in his sheet and I was super fapitzed in a suit and heels, I’d feel like I was dressed appropriately to meet HIM. However, what really matters here is the setting. If you think you’re going to be spending hours on a folding chair in a basement (I did an interview in just that location once), don’t wear a suit because you’ll look and feel ridiculous IN THE SETTING. If you think you might be in a beautiful, formal church parlor and then going to dinner at a fairly nice place, wear a suit. You could also, if the schedule permits, wear a suit for the interview in the parlor and then change into chinos and a suit jacket for dinner.

If they don’t give you a break in the day between interview and dinner, please ask for one. You aren’t responsible for the kind of babbling you will start to do over dinner if you don’t get some time to clear your head and get some fresh air and a nap or a walk.

Given the specifics of what you’re named as your wardrobe, I would go with the tweedy grey jacket with slacks and a tie for the interview, and then with chinos and a lightweight V-neck sweater for dinner.
BAM!
This is why I get the big bucks, baby. [This is a joke. I get no bucks for this! – PB]
Hair? Grooming? make sure it’s all immaculate!
Let me know if this works for you.
MWAH! PB

*****

Our dear writer thought that I gave him perfect advice and confessed that I “rock his world.” My work here is done. Holla when you get the call, honey!

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Clothing as Camouflage: Don’t Stop There

Gals, if you’re of the taller persuasion and not too curvaceous (which makes these garments very hard to fit), you may want to rock out a longer length jacket like this one. (The stupid Lane Bryant website won’t let me download the image to post here. That’s happening more and more often lately + it drives me crazy! What’s a fashion blogger to DO?)

Let me speak frankly to ya, darlings. PeaceBang has seen, many a time, a gal with a lot of bodankadonk in the trunk wear longer jackets to try to hide what the good Lord gave her. I totally get that, as I am always trying to hide what the good Lord, and years of Chicken Wing Abuse, have given me around the gut, back and lower abdomen. It’s a tough call: do you let your garments basically follow your shape, or do you disguise your shape? I think there’s a cultural shift going on, being led by our braver and more confident young people, that says, “It’s my body and I’m not dressing to hide it.”

What that means is that a lot of young women are running around in tight, cheap garments that leave nothing of their boobs, tummies and backsides to the imagination. I find that a depressing spectacle, and I’m not recommending that any of us go that far. However, I am suggesting that if you’ve been dressing all your life (or since you got a little larger in the posterior or belly or wherever) to HIDE a body part, you may be losing a lot of you in the process. All that fabric, you know. It takes a strong personality and a lot of charimsa to carry off a big swath of fabric, and especially if you’re of short stature.

In closing, pigeons, when you see a garment like the one I just linked to and say to yourself, “Wow, that is a handsome, striking jacket with long lines and flattering, feminine seaming that still suggests a man’s overcoat, and I dig that, it says what I want to say when I walk in a room,” that’s awesome. When you see that garment and think, “Oh, awesome. That coat is long enough to cover my big butt,” you need to think beyond that utilitarian approach. It may indeed cover your butt, but drag the rest of you down, or drown you in too much garment.

Your proportions are your proportions. They are but one aspect of your visual presentation. Certainly take them into account when choosing clothing, but don’t let them dictate how you decide on a style.