Holiday Season Picks

Oh hell, YES, Forever 21! I will be rocking all your amazing plus-size lewks this season!

WHY WOULDN’T I WANT TO WEAR RED NETTING, I ASK YOU? AT ANY AGE! Or apricot cold shoulder shiny tops!
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WOOT, YES, so badly do I long to THROW shiny floral fabric around my midriff and pull on some … pants? Maybe pants? and STRIDE into my place of power as a religious leader!
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ALL of these garments… ALL of ’em, are flattering, beautiful, dignified! CONFIDENCE, FEEL IT in your grown-lady romper and asymmetrical sashage! You have a CHOICE today, laydeez! You can either go Hoochie Mama Minimalist or Baby Snooks Pregnant!

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Oh, yes I will be wearing shiny hot pants this Advent! Because I am a relevant, modern, body-poz feminist minister!

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I’m gonna work that Coffee Hour like a RUNWAY.

3 Replies to “Holiday Season Picks”

  1. Was Forever 21 thinking of ministers as their primary market?

    I can’t imagine why any adult would wear any of it, but it IS called Forever 21, which implies that its market is mostly 15-year-olds. [But would you want any human of any age to have to suffer in any of this, is the ultimate existential question. NONE of it even fits the MODELS! Okay, except maybe the little hot pants. -PB]

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