Right now, my own faded hair color is brassy and yellowing, and looks terrible with my pink complexion. Noticing that today reminded me that I wanted to do a post on this.
Don’t match your hair color to your skin!
Kathy Lee Gifford is the worst celebrity offender. Every time I catch her show (or “have it inflicted on me” would be more accurate, as I am NOT a fan), she is Beige Lady. Beige face, beige hair, beige make-up, beige outfit. She radiates insecurity and unhappiness, and the drinking problem isn’t cute. It’s just sad.
For white people with pink complexions, strawberry blonde or yellowing hair is horribly unflattering. For people with taupe-undertone complexions, taupe-brown hair is horribly unflattering. If you have coffee brown skin and coffee brown hair, same thing. You get the idea: when the hair and skin match, everything just blends together and obliterates your features.
Since we’re all (more or less) in the public speaking biz, we should consider it a serious impediment to have a face that disappears when viewed from a distance. If you wear make-up, you can remedy a lot of that effect by highlighting you features, but if you don’t wear make-up and have ordinary features (not big eyelashes or naturally visible lips, for instance), you can end up looking like a talking blur. I have sat in churches and seen small women with mops of hair the same color as their skin undermine their own effectiveness as communicators because they’re not aware that their facial features are barely visible from a few feet away. All I see is flashing spectacles and a tan blur, and I have good eyesight.
African-American women who wear short naturals that match their complexions suffer the same fate. From a few pews or rows back, I’m squinting: is that a halo or her hair? Where are her eyebrows? A bit of contrast would be such an improvement.
Don’t let your hairdresser tell you that lighter hair is more youthful and then stick a bunch of bleach on your head. That’s an over-simplification. Dark hair is only aging if it’s flat and dull and has no life or dimension to it. Certainly, an all-over dark, monochromatic Morticia Addams color can bring out shadows, wrinkles and sallowness in any face. But today’s hair colors have a lot more highlights and low lights built in than previous formulas, so there’s no reason to wind up with a dull, dark color. Do some homework before you open the box or put yourself under the cape. Look at photos. When did you look your best? Can you go back to that hair color now? Is your current color really working for you? There are no hard and fast rules about what’s aging, and I’m seeing too many lovely women fall into the “blonde is better” trap. Those foils can go brassy and bring out the yellow tones in many shades of skin.
Whatever you do, don’t pull a Kathie Lee. We need to see your features.
But what about Jennifer Lopez? She makes that tawny monotone style look gorgeous. Or Lupita Nyong’o?
[I KNOW about JLo – how does she do it? A brilliant make-up artist, for one, and fantastic hair coloring that matches yet compliments her complexion. We mere mortals are not JLo, though, who relies on highlighting, contouring and false eyelashes to keep her features from disappearing into all that tawniness. Lupita Nyong’o’s hair color is a lot darker than her complexion. – PB]
IF she was wearing a coral blouse, makeup that was less mortuary like, and a non fake smile, I think her hair would be OK. That beige suit is deadly on anyone, as is what my mom always called, with a sneer, “champagne blonde” hair, the creamy blonde favored by garden clubs everywhere 😉
Going back to any old hair color is really hard in my experience. Dark colored hair looks harsh and fake unless you are really on top of it. If you have a lot of grey, like I do, dying the eyebrows (not with hair dye, but with vegetable dye, a whole separate process done by a esthetician) was essential or I looked like I was wearing a wig.
I have gone much lighter, with no added color right around my face. It is a big change, and I can’t wear a lot of the things I used to wear, but it is a ton less maintenance and more natural and I think, more flattering. Highlights only every 12 weeks or so, and my brows are fine.
I don’t do beige. My face disappears. I have only recently bought a tan jacket and tank (not together!) comforting myself with cheerful scarves. In a related story, many shades of green makes me look like I am about to vomit.
I always think of what Jean Kerr wishes she could say to sales clerks: “I can’t wear beige because I AM beige.”