A wonderful pigeon alerted me to this marvelous post by Margot Starbuck about looking real, and by real she means NO MAKE-UP and not apologizing for your bad hair day and whatnot.
“How can PeaceBang CONDONE this rejection of fabulosity,” I hear you crying. “Is she not against the very thought of leaving the house with greasy hair and no lipstick?”
Yes, darlings, I am. Very much so.
However, I am still able to appreciate Margot Starbucks’ (I love that name!) humor and spirit-filled support for going out into the world just as God made us and shining as authentic beings.
I promote authenticity of being and manner and personhood while looking put-together, bearing witness to the importance of the Church in the world by looking like leaders, and Margot promotes it by encouraging us to go forth bare-faced and conquer. I support her crusade without having any intention of participating in it, because I suspect that Margot is ministering to women who are over-stressing about their appearance, while I am reaching out to women and men who have paid far too little attention to their appearance. She is located in Durham, North Carolina (near Duke) and I am located in the Unitarian Universalist tradition of the Holy Gypsy Skirt and Bierkenstock.
Someone wrote,
” I much prefer your let’s-look-fantastic-pigeons approach, but I am nagged by the idea that maybe I’m not being “real” then? My ‘real’ is far from my fantastic. Would you like to comment?”
Sure I would. If we kept the church building itself “real,” it would be a wooden clapboard structure with benches inside and functional windows. That’s all you NEED to gather a community at worship, right? That’s reality. But how do you define real? I don’t want to live in a world without aesthetics, for then our lives would be deprived of architecture, fine art, flower-arranging, fashion, and interior design. Are you a work of art or not? Is your life a work of art that you are fashioning every day? I believe it is. For me to wake up, put on some clothing, and walk out the door would be to reject the notion that my encounter with the world is a special one, and one for which I want to prepare with respect and aesthetic intention. I don’t need to go nuts doing that: plastic surgery, $200 hair cuts, the latest designer styles, ridiculous little purses that will be off-trend in two years, insecurity and competitiveness in my attire.
Art and beauty are the REALity that I want to honor and participate in. I think American sloppiness and slobbiness is a sign of cultural decline and I grieve that. I think it’s offensive and ignorant. I cannot get behind any philosophy that encourages us to be even more perpetually comfortable at the cost of beauty and self-respect. When I compare the posture, self-presentation, adornment and presence of the typical American with the rest of the world, I see something sad and ugly. You have to travel to see this but I promise you that if you leave this country for a period of time and then return, you will be flabbergasted by the slovenliness of the American crowd in most of our towns and cities. I do not say this to suggest that Margot Starbucks’ work promotes sloppiness, just to offer an additional commentary to what we are both discussing from different perspectives.
The Christian culture that Margot Starbuck is writing from is connected to the conservative South, where the pastor-ladies have big hair and fancy dresses and spackled on make-up and lots of saccharine in their manner. I’ve seen this in publications that make me laugh out loud with their gooey pink designs, their uber-pious talk about how serve God and make a great dinner for your ma-yan at the same time, how to model saintly perfection at all times and other suggestions that make me want to throw the magazine against the wall, guzzle a beer, and belch.
And I don’t even like beer.
I am not connected in any way with that culture of Christian womanhood and don’t ever intend to be, but I think Margot Starbuck is awesome for rocking her message in the heartland of that Barbies-For-Jesus culture. Plus, it is worth mentioning that Margot herself is super cute without any make-up, and women like that can afford to promote that message. Most of us look tons better with attention to grooming and styling, and some cosmetic aid if we’re broads. So I’m going to bless Margot on her way and keep doing my thing up here, which is to encourage the unkempt, bare-faced, badly-dressed frumpy pastors who aren’t part of the Shiny Happy Perfect Christians Club to get their act together and step up their external appearance.
It’s all about context, doves. Thanks so much to Joanne for the link!!
Here’s a link to a review of Margot Starbucks’ book, Squeezed. It looks awesome.
I am not giving up the little makeup I wear, but I have to cheer for anyone with a name that cool.
Thanks for the link and the reaction. I religiously follow both BTFM and Margot’s blog, which can lead to a bit of cognitive whiplash. I often find myself thinking, “yes, yes, that’s right, that’s right” upon reading both sites, then stopping short: “wait a second, they can’t BOTH be right, can they?”
I think the common thread that appeals to me in both sites is the reminder that God created our bodies and they are therefore good and worthy of honor. PB urges us not to hate our bodies by ignoring them and succumbing to frumpitude; Margot urges us not to hate our bodies by become hostage to unrealistic standards of appearance. Ultimately, these messages are not only compatible, they are both Good News.
[That’s a wonderful interpretation, Rachel! Thank you! – PB]
Thanks for this great lead. My take is she’s rejecting the current mode of her context—middle class Western costume and market-driven grooming expectations––but forgetting she could create her own. I admire the form-flattering saris and tunics of the Indian women in my old neighborhood. These can be worn no matter how much these women weigh. They are not leaving the house frumpy, but they are not subscribing to American media/market-driven style cues. Look at Steve Jobs and Dean Kamen (founder of Segway): They wear the same jeans and shirts every day. We all could identify outfits that express who we are and suit our physical assets and lifestyles. It might require sewing, seamstress work, or altering off-the-rack offerings.
I think Margot’s message is that we are enough just as we are. This is powerful stuff in a culture obsessed with perfection.
The link to the Margot Starbuck piece no longer works. Here’s a new one!
http://thewell.intervarsity.org/in-focus/keepin-it-real