Beauty Tips for Ministers

How To Tell Someone: Smelly Vestments Edition

June 30, 2009 on 9:29 pm | In Pastoral Fashion Emergency, Or "PeaceBang, Help!" | 1 Comment

Oh, heavens, kids!! We can’t have this! A Concerned Colleague writes,

Dear PeaceBang,

I love your Blog. It is always amazing to read through your posts. However, I do have a question of my own. I know of a fellow minister whose pulpit robe is in serious need of cleaning/dry cleaning. Do you suggest that I let her know that her robes are very odorous? Of course I would take her aside discretely and let her know.

There have been a few people that have mentioned to me that her robe is not pleasant smelling.

What do you suggest?

Thanks

Rev. XX

Dear Reverend Brother,

Thanks for loving my blog. My blog loves you back!

Yes, tell her!! Absolutely! Let me give you some support in doing so. Here are two possible scenarios:

1. Pick up your own pulpit gown in your arms when you and she are together on a Sunday after church and say, “Gosh, this is getting downright smelly — time for the dry cleaners! How about I take yours, too? I’ve got this great guy who gets out sweat stains and everything!” If she declines, say that you’d like to provide the cleaning as a gift (if that makes sense — is she a seminarian and worried about finances?), or just say, “Sister So-And-So, let me just keep it real with you and tell you that both of these robes really need a cleaning! I’d be really happy to do this errand for us.”

3. If Rev. Sister doesn’t get the hint, or seems defensive, or seems clueless, ask her for a minute of her time. Sit her down, look her right in the eye and say how much you admire her and how it’s never easy to give someone such personal feedback, but that her robe is unpleasant smelling and appears in need of a cleaning. Soften the blow by saying something like, “When we’re working so hard in the Spirit we don’t always notice such details, but I respect you enough to tell you.”

If at all possible, handling this in a casual and caring way with a little dose of humor is your best bet. Including yourself as one of the people who works up a sweat in the service of the Lord wouldn’t hurt, either.

Good luck and lots of love to you. If all else fails, sneak into church early and spray that pulpit gown with Febreze. Allow time for it to dry. Leave it to the congregants to say, “Mmmm, Preacher, you smell so fresh today!”

PeaceBang, going to Febreze her own robe.