To Jennifer

I know that one of you faithful pigeons is in the midst of a terrible tragedy in your congregation. Jennifer, I am speaking of you, and to you. A couple of days ago, you officiated at the funeral of a beautiful young woman who was raped and murdered. I read the eulogy you wrote and were thoughtful enough to publish the next day on your blog. It was a beautiful and honest reflection on the young woman’s life and it proclaimed a resurrection faith in the face of her horrible death. Only another pastor would recognize the many hours of listening and attention that obviously went into that detailed and thorough eulogy. Whether or not you knew this beloved child personally or not, I couldn’t tell, but I felt that you did. Job well done, pastor.

You did not hesitate to share funny stories about the young woman’s childhood, which gave the grieving congregation permission to laugh. By doing so you took away an important measure of emotional power from the murderer and restored it to the community. That took so much heart. You did not whitewash Tara’s life or make her a saint. You did not offer the kind of shallow bromides that turn so many people away from the church at a time like this. You named evil and violence. And you named love as the power that can overcome it. That was fine and brave ministry.

I felt your spirit as I read your words. I felt your faith. I was moved by the way you urged the mourners to join you in that faithfulness. I could tell that that as you preached that morning, you upheld a community of devastated people with your strength. Girl, that is spiritual boulder-lifting. That is huge psychic work that many of us have known, and we surround you now with our solidarity and love. All of us who minister know that the shock and horror of this crime had to have hit you hard in body, mind and soul and that you took it to God in prayer. We believe that God was with you, and so were we.

Who ministers to the minister? Jennifer, my prayer for you today is that you are held in comfort and care as you feel the exhaustion that comes at such times. I pray that you are sleeping deeply and well. I pray that you are not rushing into a crowded schedule and that you will have time to cry and grieve and let down that public face that you have been holding together on behalf of your community. I pray that you’re being nurtured in all the ways you need. Watching you from a sad and admiring distance this past few days, I wanted to say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.” May the healing Spirit be with you and your people as you walk forward together through the valley of the shadow of death.

We who are your sisters and brothers in this work lift you up.

We lift up Tara Rose to God’s eternal peace.