A very sad day. A day to walk around heart and soul-sick.
A day to sit crying in Starbucks where I was doing some work when I got the news from my sister, who lives in Newtown, CT just a few miles from Sandy Hook Elementary School.
An evening to gather in the church, to say some things about grief and sorrow, to be together in prayer, to light candles and to hear a litany of recognition for all those who help and who care. I got this idea from Mr. Rogers – no kidding — whose advice on how to talk to children I relied on in preparing our short, simple, kid-friendly liturgy. Mr. Rogers advises us to emphasize the helpers. There are so many people helping and caring. We need to tell our children that.
At the end of our little service, I invited each person present to take with them a little candy cane. “Take some sweetness with you,” I said, “to remember that you have sweetness within you to give to this broken world that so needs it.”
I looked down at myself in the middle of the little gathering and realized I was (am) wearing a knee-length black baby doll dress, purple tights, cowboy boots, and a purple sweater. It was my day off today and I forgot to change before church. I hardly know I have a body at all today, let alone what it’s wearing. Well, so I looked like a kid. So what. It was a service for children.
Last Friday night a reckless driver (who had just left the bar down the street – draw your own conclusions) smashed into the telephone pole at the end of the parsonage driveway and knocked out power to the whole town. There was a dog in the car that I wound up taking home for awhile, and subsequent sadness and drama. The driver will be fine, as will the dog. What happened, though, was that as the power was restored there was a little problem with one line that the power company didn’t connect correctly and I had power surges at the house for two hours that fried several of my major appliances and light fixtures. So I have no washer or dryer, no television, no treadmill — did I tell you all this already? It’s been a long week. I’ve been on the phone and/or visiting with with my homeowner’s insurance, the driver’s car insurance, the electric company, the police, my own insurance agent…. just running around with no results all week.
Tonight I have children in my head. All in my head, a whole classroom of them. Little scramblers. That age. Oh, it’s such a delicious age, my very favorite. What’s more fun than hanging around with a bunch of kindergarteners? What’s more stinkin’ precious than a 6 year-old kid? Nothing. I know I don’t have to say this to you if you have one of these babies in your own home to love and care for, but please give them an extra kiss from me. Just smell them on the head while they’re sleeping for me. Babies, I’m so, so sorry we haven’t been courageous enough to make this world safer for you.
With tears, PB
PB – Thank you so much for your words. Our hearts ache for all of those involved. And reminding us of Rev. Rogers’ call to remember the helpers is always a good thing. The Advent cry of “Come, Lord Jesus,” seems so appropriate at this time as we seek justice, truth, and love. Lord, in your mercy…
hear our prayers.
When I heard of this tragedy I wondered how close it was to you. I am so glad that you were able to do something for the community.
We are doing our children’s program on Sunday. I will raise up the victims of this tragedy during our Joys and Concerns while still honoring our children and their teachers for bringing joy into our sanctuary.
God, hear our prayers.
I’ve been wondering what to say to our children in church on Sunday–Mr. Rogers is just the ticket. Thanks…
At our little service tonight we gave out strips of soft cloth. The youth handing them out said, “Would you like a blankie?”
We sang lullabies at our vigil tonight.
Holding you in my prayers. All this and stressful times at home too.
Do what you need to stay safe; my heart is feeling so concerned for you.
There are many tears, many prayers, but simply, no words.
I cried when I read the news as well. Just held my partner and cried. And spent extra time with one of the six year olds in my life, just watching fraggle rock and eating candy canes, in the midst of all the holiday craziness. Some tragedies just hit so close to home.
This morning I am remembering the children of my own congregation, remembering them standing up at the service held after the shooting in our sanctuary in 2008 and singing “The Sun Will Come Out, Tomorrow”. I am remembering the cards that came in from all over the world, the unexpected support from every corner of our city, the long slow path of healing we still walk.
My heart aches for Newtown, for the people of all ages whose sense of safety has been shattered, who are reeling from the shock and anger and confusion this sort of violence brings. May they be held by all of us, may we hold each other, may some spark of transformation arise from our pain. May love stay center for all of us, as we move further into this month of December and the New Year.
Co-mingled tears.
Blessings to you in your ministry. May you feel lifted up and loved.
What lovely words. I have one of those (she’s 7 and also a beautiful 9 year old brother) in my house….last night we snuggled and stayed up too late watching movies on the couch. Gun violence has affected their lives hugely but they are able to say, Love wins. They are loved and they know it. People care. It’s my prayer that all the people of Newtown will feel that love and care coming to them this weekend and in the coming weeks, months, and years. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
I’ll give our little guy a kiss for you!
I thought of you guys when we sang this hymn today:
“God is Love; and though with blindness
sin afflicts all human life,
God’s eternal loving-kindness
guides us through our earthly strife.
Sin and death and hell shall never
o’er us final triumph gain;
God is Love, so Love for ever
o’er the universe must reign.”
God bless you all.
It’s Sunday evening – I have read many posts by clergy people – thank you – all of you – who have found words of comfort and inspiration
in your hearts for the rest of us who are in your congregations or online