“Take Back Yer Mink, Take Back Yer Poils, What Made You Think That I Was One Of Those Goils?”*

Kim has this to recommend for you little peanut faces,

I’m a short, young-looking woman working towards being a minister, and I can’t plug enough the classifying power of jewelry that says “I am an adult.” A string of pearls is a tool I have often used to bring a touch of unmistakeable adulthood.

Another, slightly more drastic tool is the short haircut. My round cherubic face looked much much younger behind a shoulder-length style- getting a pixie cut exposed cheekbones and a jawline that make me look my REAL age.

Well-played, Kimba. How about some photos?


You know this woman is probably like, 22. Don’t get all dowagery on us, pigeons.


Multiple strands are very in right now, although one wouldn’t want to do the fresh-out-of-bed-tumbled-tigress hair and huge eyeliner with them.


I love this era. 1912. Single strand of pearls with a square neckline, big hair with fab hair wrap. J’adore.

*Yet another musical theatre reference, sweetlings, this one from the legendary pen of Frank Loesser from his smash hit, “Guys and Dolls.”

12 Replies to ““Take Back Yer Mink, Take Back Yer Poils, What Made You Think That I Was One Of Those Goils?”*”

  1. Work the pearls, but tread ye carefully with the short haircut. I did that in my mid twenties as an attempt to “grow up.” It did age me and was very depressing! A lot of young women do feel so empowered when they cut their hair. I would say, however, do not do this just for your profession. It is YOUR hair, do it if it feels right in a number of areas of your life. Do you want short hair for WORK? Wear it in a bun every day at work, if that is the only place you want short hair. Do you want short hair on a date, hiking with friends and making love to your husband as WELL as in a suit on Sunday? Then cut it.

    Growing my hair long again has been very empowering for me to embrace my whole self. We have to work with our femininity in a traditionally masculine context. For me, my hair is a physical manifestation of that, just like my feminine shape. Allowing myself to be a long haired lady minister feels more integrated as a person AND more free to compartmentalize different aspects of my life. My long blond hair is a part of my current look, but I have to think about how to manage it in terms of my image. Some looks are WAY too youthful for work (or ever…) but I can enjoy wearing my hair that way on my day off or out with my husband. It took me a while to figure out that I needed to express myself differently in different areas of my life. That’s one gift of PB for me, the gift of hairstyles and clothes for “time off.”
    Don’t feel like you HAVE to cut your hair to be taken seriously as a minister. But don’t let me tell you not to!
    And whatever look you choose, the sooner we all accept that hair at ANY length requires care and maintenance, the better!

  2. Not that long ago, as your 1912 photo shows, women who had reached the age of maturity kept their long hair, but they put it up. It would take effort and lots of experimentation, but a young minister can achieve a dignified image without losing inches of well-maintained hair.

    And, if I recall correctly, that one of the usual gifts for debutante, bride or college grad was a strand of pearls. These days they don’t have to be real, but they are certainly a foundation piece in a woman’s jewelry box.

  3. Pearls: I like to wear 3 strands of very different types – tiny seed pearls, larger ones, and a strand with a few pearls separated by lengths of silver chain. I get walloped with class-consciousness when people comment on them, though, feeling the urge to explain that the seed pearls were cheap and worn with my wedding dress, and the other 2 strands are fake and were purchased at the church tag sale.

    Hair: Ah, I remember PB (before she was PB) gently suggesting that my long, unruly locks held back by 2 barrettes might, perhaps not be a “current” look. I resisted for years, not wanting to spend a second more on my hair than I had to. What a relief that with the right cut and hair product, my obedient, wavy hair still lets me just scrunch and go. In old pictures, I can’t believe how I managed to look so young, unprofessional and out-of-date all at one time. [ LOLing at your excellent memory… xoxo – PB]

  4. pearls have to be read in context: in my current pastoral situation, pearls smack of money and elitism….when I was in cpe in the south, one of the nurses wore pearls every day with her scrubs…real ones…cuz that’s what lady does, even in the hospital wards….. [good point! – PB]

  5. I think Melissa’s right – cut it if that’s something that is appealing to you outside of work. PB’s totally right about how much it ages you, though. I finally got a short-short pixie after years of not having the guts. I didn’t realize until I saw my first pictures after the haircut how much older it would make me look – I finally look like I’m close to thirty. I love it. And – on time off I can spike it up and look way more fun than I ever did with the sweet little bob I wore for years.

  6. Ah, Women and Hair — that holiest, hottest of topics! I have had unruly, wavy, frizzy, dry hair atop my head all my life and through the years have managed it with everything from buzz cuts to perms. It has recently thinned and receded considerably (another gift of the Menopause Fairy), and I havefinally decided to find it charming nd surprising no matter what its shape, length or texture. It’s an accessory. Grow it long (if you have enough hair to do it), cut it short if you dare, dye it, spike it, wrap it — but love it and care for it (and yourself) and wear it confidently, boldly and with joy while you have it, sisters. Radiate delight and personal (not to mention pastoral) authority will follow suit.

  7. When a lady wears pearls, she has something appropriate to clutch to express her shock and dismay without necessarily even saying a word.

    Beleive me, clutching a necktie is not effective.

    😉

  8. Short hair doesn’t always make you look older, but it can sometimes make you look more put-together. My super-straight hair would hang limply at any length, chin to shoulder, regardless of the time and effort I devoted to styling it; I’m sure people assumed I rolled out of bed without trying to fix it. I eventually cut it really short and was sometimes told I looked younger (than my 30something age? than my previous look? I don’t know), but I was also told I look better. I think looking like you have a style–short or long–is more important than looking older or younger. I can’t do anything about my age, but I can choose to make an effort at my style.

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