Wow!!
Pigeons, can you believe it!! On April 14, this blog turned FIVE years old!
It all started back in 2006 when I wrote a post on my regular PeaceBang blog (which is RE-LAUNCHING this week after a two year hiatus!) about Make-Up For Ministers. This post was inspired by SisterBang, who is a funny, hip, artist and woman who loves beauty. We had talked at length about clergy image and the frumpiness that was rampant among men and women of the cloth. SisterBang urged me to start a blog on the subject. I demurred. What would I have to say beyond one or two posts? “PLENTY,” responded SisterBang, and the rest is history.
I started writing in a voice that I hoped would be both outrageous and fun. I thought of BTFM as a sort of salon presided over by a character who was equal parts Auntie Mame, RuPaul, and Cotton Mather. With no formal training in style or beauty behind me (just a lifetime as the daughter of MotherBang, a woman who has FLAIR TO SPARE and who set out huge shoe boxes of make-up and mirrors with theatre lighting for me and SisterBang to play with on rainy days when we were tiny tots), forty years of musical theatre performing to inform me, years of poring over fashion magazines to inspire and caution me, and a world of frustration with the depressing visual image presented by clergy within me, I began. It was an act of total chutzpah fueled by coffee, the Holy Spirit, and my passionate desire for the Church to survive and thrive in the 21st century.
You responded. You got PeaceBang. You trusted her with your questions. We had some rip-snorting arguments and fantastic conversations. You have sent me hundreds of fan letters. I have met dozens of you in person. You read this blog from at least nine different countries (that I know of!) and you are men, women, transgendered, young, old, black, white, Latina, Asian, gay, straight, bisexual, Christian, Jewish, Pagan, Muslim, Eastern Orthodox, rural, urban, suburban, big church, small church, no church, seminarian, professor, librarian, and every other interesting human thing under the sun. You have contributed thousands of comments. You have connected and made friends. You have revealed yourselves, you have written anonymously, you have lurked, you have absolutely delighted me with your thoughtfulness when I have become strained or angry and shown it on this blog. Most of you have remembered that there is a person behind PeaceBang, and have appreciated what I am trying to do and given me the inspiration to keep doing it.
The media has had fun with this blog. It was featured on the Boston Globe’s front page one Sunday morning. I have appeared on radio shows, television and in print. I have turned away producers from half a dozen news shows to spare my congregation and myself the stress that can come with that kind of coverage. I have chosen to grant interviews only to reporters who represent the kind of journalism I trust and admire, and I am proud to have been deemed worthy of their attention. If you want to review the press that BTFM has gotten, click on the “media” button at the top of this page. It’s all there.
I continue to see a serious need for this ministry. I still see horrible clergy photos on web sites, and I continue to be baffled by the unkempt, frumpy or bizarrely clueless appearance of too many clergymen and women (lately I’ve been seeing a look I can only call “1970’s Used Car Salesman” on male ministers). I am fascinated by the ways that social media can enhance ministry, and will be writing and speaking on those issues at two upcoming conferences.
So thank you, my dear powder pigeons. Thanks for five great and fascinating years, for being the center of this important conversation, for having fun with it, and for letting me be your Stage Mother. You are all stars.
Kiss of peace. MWAH!
PB
Dear PeaceBang,
Thanks so much for this blog. I’ve been following it for just a few months. Although I’m not an ordained member of the clergy, I am a lay Eucharistic visitor and college instructor (which I think of as a calling and a ministry). Your blog has been helpful to me, in large part because of the “tellin’ it like it be” voice, as well as the practical suggestions.
Today I showed up at the court appearance of woman I visit, who made a bad relationship decision and a couple of other mistakes and was arrested. Fortunately, the woman had legal representation, and a family member was there as well. But I, too, felt called to show up this morning. The appointment was for 9:00 a.m., and I remembered some of your tips as I dashed around getting ready. The better raincoat and some old-but-shined dress shoes, plus black slacks, a neat sweater, a tailored blouse and nice “statement” necklace – these were all choices I made with your voice in my head.
Well, it was noted by the magistrate and the arresting officer that the woman had both a mom and a friend from her church there. The community support was definitely a factor in convincing the magistrate that this person would stay on her program. So I was not just a “warm body” – people saw me, and my appearance did matter.
Thanks for constantly reminding us that a few small wardrobe choices do have an impact on our work in the world.
Glad to hear that PeaceBang is coming back. Happy anniversary.
Thank you, PeaceBang for this entertaining, insightful, and thought provoking blog.
I really AM NOT into fashing blogs, but this blog I enjoy and I regulartly visit. You write well and with passion.
Thank you for this ministry. The Church is blessed.
I have to tell you about a little exchange at my lectionary gathering this Monday.
I referenced your Rowan Williams quote and said that it could be found at beautytipsforministers.com.
One of the other ministers asked, “Is that from his book [Title which I still don’t know]?”
I said, “I don’t know. I’m doing all my research these days at beautytipsforministers.”
To which another person responded, “Well, it’s working.”
I took that as a huge compliment. Thank you!
[That’s so cute! Thanks for sharing! – PB]
hooray for you and your blog! you do an important ministry with us.
two questions:
1. is that adorable pic of your neat and tidy closet? envious! [Darling, it is ONE of my closets. It is the NEAT ONE.]
2. you said you are doing a couple of workshops on social media … where? when? General Assembly (hoping)?
[YES, with the Revs. Stefan Jonassen and Andrea Perry Lerner. Look for us! – PB]
happy blog birthday. celebration and blessings!
Thanks for your ministry!! As I read the first four paragraphs I thought, “Oh no! PB is retiring!” And then I got to the fifth paragraph and breathed a huge sigh of relief. I discovered your blog the summer before I came to seminary, right after breaking up with someone who didn’t think women should be ordained, and I’ve avidly followed your fashion/ministry advice since then. Three years later, I’m about to graduate and I can’t wait to get your continuing input as I begin my full-time ministry! THANK YOU!!
Thank you, PB, for the humor and depth of insights given throughout the years and blessings as you bless us through this blog.
MWAH! Right back at ya!
For a moment there, I was terrified this was a farewell post! You helped a great deal in my last round of job interviews, and you will not know how much I appreciate it.
It’s a good work, especially to help younger women think in terms of representative authority.
Adding my thanks for all you do with this blogging ministry 🙂
Muchas gracias, amiga
You have a great writing voice, PeaceBang, and I love reading your blog. I also love the boots in your picture! What are they? [Those boots are Harley Davidson platform motorcycle boots that I got for $30 in an antique store on Route 66 in Amarillo, Texas, darlin’. They weight about 10 lbs. each and make me feel really tall and like a rough tough cowgirl.- PB]
Happy anniversary! I definitely get dressed in the morning with a “what would PB say?” in the back of my mind. (And, I’m sorry to confess, sometimes tell it, “I don’t care, I’ve got 10 minutes to find a pressed shirt and get out of here” . . . TIME is the most important ingredient in good grooming.)
Please, please post about the “1970′s Used Car Salesman” look. It sounds hilarious and necessary.
Peacebang! As a teen feeling called into ministry (several moons ago), I proclaimed to my mom, the pastor, and anyone who would listen, “I’ll be bringing fashion to the pulpit, people. You don’t have to look hideous to be a person of the cloth!” So, I cannot believe I am just now stumbling on your blog. You rock! Happy Anniversary! And thank you! [Better now than never, my kitten! Welcome! – PB]