Posted on by PeaceBang

Avoid Hat Head

What a silly billy. Ruth writes,

I have just come across the most comprehensive collection of ecclesiastical headgear at http://www.dieter-philippi.de/mydante_1479.html.
I have always steered clear of ecclesiastical hats for fear of getting hat-hair. Should I shave my bouncy hair off so that I can join the boys in sporting one of these snazzy numbers? Please help.

Oh yes! Klerikale Kopfbedeckungen! One of my favorite sites! I often go there just to drool at their very fine headwear. As the granddaughter of a milliner, of course, I have a fine eye for haberdashery. Just kidding!! Girl, I know a souped up yalmulke when I see one. And although I assume you’re kidding, of course you shouldn’t wear a church beanie. However, a cute little beret could be adorABLE. PeaceBang has one trimmed with a feather; it’s quite dashing.

To avoid hat head, fluff up your hair with your fingers after removing your chapeau. If you get frizzies, a tiny dab of hand lotion rubbed between the palms and then brushed over the hair will help. If you get crazy helmet head, PeaceBang is afraid she can’t help you. The trick there may be to escape to the washroom, wet your hair slightly and stick your head under the electrical hand dryer. Just don’t get confused and stick your finger in the light socket because you might go carooming off the wall and bang your head on the sink and wind up with a shiner. Which would be so much worse than hat hair.

You see, Ruth? A silly question gets a silly answer. I’m onto you, ya nuttyhead!

8 Replies to “Avoid Hat Head”

  1. This is unrelated, but Caroline Divine wants to know when PeaceBang is going to start talking about Project Runway again. Because the season has just started and Caro. Div., this evening, watched Episode One (I know, it first aired a week ago, but I had pastoral responsibilities that night and didn’t get a grip on the fact that we were In Season till a day or two ago; thank Goddess for reruns) and she is dying to know what PeaceBang thinks of this year’s crew and of the first challenge.

    She also thinks, more than ever, that Heidi Klum is a dominatrix and maybe also a sadist.

    Watching that first episode was excruciating at times and Caroline Divine thinks she may have to keep smelling salts handy, or perhaps a judiciously placed dose of benzodiazepines (legal and with prescription, of course). Oh, the suspense.

    [SisterBang e-mailed me WHILE WATCHING THE FIRST EPISODE WITHOUT ME! I didn’t even know it had started up again!! When is it on? I can’t BELIEVE the betrayal!! – PB]

  3. Wow, what a site!

    I had some good laughs, but couldn´t read all explanations.
    It´s so weired- to find this site I had to read yours.

    I miss “my” beret being listed- being a young lutheran vicar in the south-west of Germany myself.
    (Not that I own one- but I despreately missed it last week when I froze my ears off while conducting a funeral on the cemetery during heaviest snowfall)

    YES- your site is read in Germany, too!

    Thank you, PeaceBang, for this great blog.
    [Wilkommen im Beauty Tips for Ministers, Chavale! How wonderful to hear from you from the Land of Luther! Big kisses from PB!]
    I learned sooooo much from it.

    Dressing lady-like as a clergwoman in her early 30s can be so challenging- sometimes.

    Blessings!

  4. Thanks for the chuckles, PB.

    If Caroline Divine can mention off-topic stuff, then I guess I can, too.

    I’ve made some serious gripes about a couple of cases of bad quality in ready-to-wear clothing, and also a description of a good shopping experience at The Psaltery lately. (http://psaltery.blogspot.com)

  5. Ruth might also note, of course, that a number of head toppers in that page are academic rather than ecclesiastical in nature, and so there must surely exist resources that instruct, to the point of academic prolixity, how to avoid hat-hair while wearing them. Also, Her Majesty the Queen of England might provide advice on how to best avoid hat-hair whenever using the Imperial State Crown, which was also pictured somewhere on that page.

  6. Hmmm…I’m about to start chemotherapy, and that site gave me some ideas! (It also made me laugh–especially the enormous pom-poms.) I’m pretty sure that wigs are not for me. Any suggestions for headgear that will go with an alb, over a bald female head? Thanks!

  7. i am searching for an actual hat maker/milliner/whatever selling galeros…love the little tassels!! of course, PB has a link! love you, gurrrl. saw the comment about project runway and wondered: has PB ever looked at the english “Clery on the Runway”? where models and clergy types model the latest fashions?

    before juliet hemingray there was this amazing woman who designed THE MOST amazing, beautiful, and stylish clergy-drag for women-priests. while at the graduate theological union in 1996, this woman brought some of her designs. why i didn’t go ahead and order the stuff then i don’t know; i could kick myself. i still dream of her brown women’s clergy suit and her cassock that was to die for…black wool, empire waisted sorta but falling from pleats that moved to reveal gorgeous silk in the deep pleats (they were in dark almost black purple silk)…. NO ONE else has done anything this pretty or interesting. i lost my information in a move to panama when everything flooded and was destroyed. should have known then and just moved back to the US and saved ourselves the headache of the diocese of panama (episcopal) where the bishop and clergy BRAG about eating endangered turtle!! i kid you not! one would think this would be grounds for excommunication. it certainly made me leave the church–with the horrors of racism against the First Peoples, tedious macho (the flip side of tedious, scary white male entitlement, which, as we know, is truly terrifying), rampant homophobia, the WORST liturgy i’ve ever seen, no high church anywhere, no daily masses and liturgies, ugly churches without silence-stillness-and Beauty, and purple and black white collared folk eating turtle…jeez!! i could go on and on at the atrocities that freed me from the episcopal church but i’m really interested in hearing PB comments about “Clergy on the Catwalk”–as well as finding an actual source for folks selling galeros…

    all the best to you!
    oonie

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