Beauty Tips for Ministers
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Hamhock Alert! More on Self-Care And I Mean It This Time
June 30, 2007 on 11:34 am | In Miscellany, Self Care |Bonjour from the beauteous Pacific Northwest, my doves!
I am staying in Seattle as the guest of a Methodist clergy brother who offerered me hospitality DURING THE PASSING OF THE PEACE at the Festival of Homiletics in Nashville this past May. What trust! What kindness! What Christian virtue! I still can’t quite get over it. Not only did he invite me to stay with him and his wife for three nights without having any acquaintance with me whatsoever, he left a key for me yesterday afternoon because he and his wife had an opportunity to spend a night away. It seems they hosted a youth group last week and needed a bit of R & R for themselves. One can only imagine. What is harder to imagine, however, is leaving a key to your home for a total stranger and inside, a note that says, “Make yourself at home!”
I am humbled by their goodness.
I am also, to get to the subject at hand, humbled by the photographs of me taken at General Assembly. The Bad Hair is one thing (either too dry or greasy, too blonde, unstylable) but the enormous hamhock upper arms are another. I am becoming my great-grandmother! You can start calling me Baba Billo. I knew the gut was deteriorating. I knew the legs were getting more tree-stumpish with every week away from the gym. I knew the face was losing its battle to retain notable bone structure. But mon Dieu! My upper arms are going to need their own zip code soon!
Here it is, chickens. Looking back over the year and realizing that I have given my congregation 100%, my doctoral program 100%, my new student minister 100%, and the class that I’m teaching 100% helps me to understand and to accept that I have been giving myself the Leftovers. Ooh, and such yummy leftovers! Macaroni and cheese! Quesadillas! Steak tips and Ben & Jerry’s!
All kidding aside, and all self-acceptance in my heart, I’m going to change some priorities and lose some habits. I love my life too much to let it continue so out of balance. I do believe that these are excellent years for working hard — and even too hard. I’m only 41, and I have tons of energy and passion. Why not? But it’s just not fair or wise to keep loading weight onto my body as though I am some kind of indefatigable sherpa and not a fairly small person with an insatiable appetite, love of food and rebellious denial of the effects of both.
I saw this morning that our fall district minister’s retreat is on the subject of self-care, and that it will be led by a colleague who runs several miles a day and who has always been incredibly fit and trim. He has a message that clergy have to model health and wellness in body as well as soul. Isn’t that serendipitalicous?
I can’t make weight loss my goal, because I know how THAT works, and it’s called failure. But when I get home I am going to join Weight Watchers with the aim of re-learning portion sizes and mindfulness in the mangia department. I’m going to try to find some kind of dance class or activity to do on a regular basis, return to the gym (I actually LIKE the gym!) and I’m going to have a long hard talk with myself about some of the habits that need to get kicked to the curb (like reading celebrity gossip mags or beauty magazines while munching snacks as the ultimate brainless break).
While on the Oregon coast the other day I was praying about the weeks of summer: “God, what would you have me do with this time?” And God said, “HOW ABOUT TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF, DINGBAT?”
And I said, “Oh! Ha ha! Oh yeah! Thanks, God! I forgot all about that!”
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“Serendipitalicous,” I love that!
What I love more is how you can be funny and deep, snarky and caring, sharp and loving all at the same time.
Have you done Weight Watchers before? I do South Beach and really like it. Something about the Buying of Special Foods diets doesn’t appeal to me, so I’m always curious how they work for others. Keep us posted.
Oh, and welcome back!
Comment by Louise — June 30, 2007 #
My thoughts exactly. Self care has to be a priority. I notice when I focus more on taking care of myself, suddenly, coincidentally (I think not!) I am more creative and compassionate, and generally happier.
In response to Louise, above — I have done Weight Watchers several times. Weight Watchers does have a line of foods available in the grocery store, none are needed or required to do the WW program. They only make things more convenient for things like lunches at work or quick dinners before an evening meeting — or desserts packaged into appropriate portions.
Comment by Ann — June 30, 2007 #
congratulations on your resolve. I too, find it impossible to loose weight in order to loose weight, but for my health, I have been able to. South Beach has a lot of good info, even if the diet itself is too strict. Blessings!
Comment by Christine Robinson — June 30, 2007 #
It’s a good reminder for us all. The sexton at our church just said to me, “You’ve got it all together. You have so much self-control, you don’t even eat lunch.”
I answered, “Oh no. I just don’t want to stop working.”
He laughed at me, because it sounded nuts. Which it was. My new goal: three squares and no more fast food!
Comment by Carol — June 30, 2007 #
Came to about the same realization over Christmas 2006 pictures. I’ve been doing the Weight Watchers points program since January and it’s been really helpful, even on those days that I simply must have Ben & Jerry’s!
Comment by Stephanie — June 30, 2007 #
Good for you! Way to go on making a commitment to good stewardship of the physical body with which you are blessed. Some ideas-
Exercise:
- Make appointments on your schedule (with yourself) to exercise. If you are going to be at church until, say, 8:00pm for meetings on a particular day, balance that out by leaving the office for an exercise appt. earlier in the day. Treat these exercise appointments as you would other important obligations– decline to schedule non-emergent requests during these times: “I’m sorry, I have an appointment at that time. Let’s find another time that will work for both of us.”
- Walking counts as exercise, and can be simpler to fit in than other activities. 30 minutes per day, 5 days per week. It will add up.
- If you don’t already have one, is there any chance of getting a machine such as a treadmill or exercise bike in your place of residence? That lowers the barriers to exercising, even if it’s dark out or the weather is bad or you don’t feel like driving to the gym. You can pedal while you watch your fave TV show, or while you read celebrity gossip mags, for that matter.
- What about starting a program at your church– i.e. a group that meets once a week and prays and then walks for 30 minutes, or something (be creative!)? That gets it into your schedule, and also encourages your congregants to join you in being good stewards of their health. How about a weekly church-sponsored Tai Chi or yoga session? Many geriatricians recommend that people do Tai Chi in order to reduce their risk of falls as they age (improved balance, muscle strength.)
Diet:
- I think the South Beach diet is very good. It has helped me.
- Always eat breakfast! (I expect you know this one already.)
- Secrete healthy snacks in various locations (work, car) so you don’t get so ravenous in the midst of your busy life that you make food choices you will regret later.
- Eat at least 5 servings of fruits and vegetables per day.
I wish you the best as you pursue this worthy endeavor! You are not only investing in your own future by working for better health, but you will be able to better serve God and God’s other children with your heart, mind, and strength if you maintain the bodily framework within which those gifts are located.
Comment by Laura — July 1, 2007 #
I have had success with Weight Watchers, and recommend it as a good way to learn portion sizes. It is not a “Buying of Special Foods diet”. I have recently gone back to it, and am learning how to listen to my body on the “core” program, which is much more about eating to satisfaction (not as much as we want). My previous problem with WW was losing weight by eating unhealthy things. I feel much better about it this time around. I highly recommend the CORE program and the message boards on the WW website. Good luck!
Comment by Rebecca — July 1, 2007 #
I have had a lot of success with a free little website called sparkpeople.com. It is more lifestyle change oriented instead of being a “diet” site. It has nutrition calculators, articles, message boards, all sorts of stuff. It is totally worth a look. I have lost 56lbs since Christmas.
Comment by princess pinky — July 1, 2007 #
Hi, Peacebang; I haven’t commented in awhile, but… congrats on selecting ww. I started two years ago this august, when I was 41. I lost 85 lbs and have had it off one year.
It is a great program. My wife and I both follow it. If you need e parnters on this journey, email either of us.
Best wishes
Comment by Small "u" nitarian — July 2, 2007 #
Good for you, PB! I hope WW works better for you than it did for me. I just find that unless I do three things I don’t succeed in this arena:
1. Food is an addiction. Carbs and sugar are the big culprits. WW doesn’t help here in that they peddle the worst sort of junk food as low in points but high in sugar and refined flour.
2. Portion control is everything, but eating fewer options is better. (this is where ozment’s “you on a diet” is helpful and it is another criticism I have of WW.) Vitamin supplements helpful in weight loss (in that one can eat chicken and broccoli or fish and salad repeatedly and not suffer ill effects), as are fish oil supplements. You know all this, I’m sure.
3. Excercise is key, and I really am bad at incorporating a regular excercise regime. Good for you for liking it! I like the way it makes my pants fit;)
Please keep us up to date as to how you do! I’m on the path, too.
Comment by madgebaby — July 2, 2007 #
I’m quite glad to know that I’m not the only one who gets called “Dingbat” by God!
and all strength and power to you with the self-care thing. the pisser about WW is that it works if you stick to the plan!!
Comment by WomynRev — July 2, 2007 #
I just started checking in and LOVE this blog. “Take care of yourself!”
will check if you have any advice re: cute, but still sensible shoes (for those of us who will be in walkers soon if we don’t)
I have problem with weight too, walking the dog helps SOME, would help more if I was still 25, but I’m not.
Comment by Diane — July 2, 2007 #
I’m on an absolutely awesome diet, sort of a modified Adkins, that all of my doctors approve of. I’ve lost all kinds of crazy weight; anyone can e-mail me for details. It’s not been hard at all or unpleasant but delicious and lots of fun.
Comment by Ellis — July 3, 2007 #
I’m reading “The Omnivore’s Dilemma” which points out that most of us are eating far more corn than we would suspect. Anyone who is wanting to be more intentional about food, go green, and model healthful eating ought to look at this. Diane Miller
Comment by Diane Miller — July 3, 2007 #
I’m with Diane Miller, though my book recommendation is a different one: “Animal, Vegetable, Miracle,” by Barbara Kingsolver. It’s not a weight loss book by any means, but it IS about sensible eating and its relationship to food production. I have been (you should pardon the expression) eating it up for the last week, and can hardly put it down.
Why don’t we invite Barbara Kingsolver to General Assembly? I am certain that many UU’s read every word she writes–she is so much on our wave length regarding values, lifestyle, and what is important.
This is a good read, and if you wanted to, you could preach on it, but you could also just enjoy it and get in the habit of frequenting your nearest Farmers Market in support of local agriculture.
Like Michael Pollen, she makes the point about the relationship between obesity and cheap (that is, government-subsidized) food, especially corn. This paragraph is my lame attempt to make this comment NOT be a hijack of PB’s commitment to self-care this summer. Go for it, girl!
Comment by Judy Welles — July 4, 2007 #
I second asking Barbara Kingsolver to GA. I’ve read nearly everything she’s written and love her sense of connection to the earth and to each other.
Comment by marcia — July 4, 2007 #
Thanks, ya’ll! Judy, great idea about getting B. Kingsolver to GA! I’m also reading “Animal, Vegetable, Miracle” and loving it.
Comment by PeaceBang — July 4, 2007 #
Of course I’m totally down with you feeling good about yourself and feeling/being healthy. But please DO know that when I first saw you at GA this year, I thought you were beautiful! And then even more so later, when you’d donned the head wrap.
Comment by h sofia — July 5, 2007 #