Who loves to shop for clothes? No one!
Who has time to sew their own garments? Ma Ingalls, but she’s not available right now, and you’ll just have to accept that fact and get on with your life.
It falls on all of us to clothe ourselves, darlings, since the LORD isn’t going to outfit us in splendor in any way but the spiritual way, although the lilies of the field are already taken care of. There is an uncomfortable reality all clergy must fact, which is that at some point you have to actually acquire the clothing you wear, and unless you inherit a bespoke wardbrobe on a regular basis, that means you have to engage in the carnal activity we call SHOPPING.
SHOPPING is far more objectionable to modern-day religious leaders than the carnal activity formerly known as fornication. And there’s good reason for that. Shopping is demoralizing, exhausting and expensive, not to mention overwhelming. All those stores! All those billions of garments! All those moral issues associated with purchasing them!
But what can you do? You have to get yourself outfitted, so you may as well approach the task with a sense of creativity and gratitude. You’re lucky you have a body to clothe. You’re lucky to be in a position that requires you to pay mind to your appearance. You’re lucky to have a washer and dryer to launder those clothes in, or a dry cleaner nearby who can clean them for you.
Enough mopey moralizing! Let’s shop!
Here are some tips to help you navigate the onerous task:
1. Do the groundwork to discover brands that are as well-made as you can afford (with whatever other requirements you yourself hold, eg, made in the USA under fair labor conditions, etc). Unless your size fluctuates a lot or you have a tendency to switch styles or color palettes frequently, it is always worth the investment to buy the best you can afford.
2. Google “wardrobe staples” and put together a list of your necessities: a black suit, a charcoal suit. A good wool overcoat. A rain trenchcoat. Black shoes, taupe or tan shoes (to wear with navy or lighter colors). White shirts or blouses. Black trousers, a black pencil skirt.
The basics should fit you impeccably. Budget for a tailor.
3. Never shop without a goal in mind, even if you’re going for retail therapy. Maybe your goal is to find two shirts that add some color to your wardrobe and are seasonally focused. You may wind up finding cheap, fun shirts. Fine. You may wind up finding nothing. Use the time as an opportunity to focus on yourself, your image, your reflection. How are you doing, kid? Been awhile since you spent some time staring into a mirror, hasn’t it? How’s your skin? Your complexion? Your weight? Are you finding yourself sighing a lot? That’s because you haven’t breathed deeply in too long. Be kind. It’s not at all unusual to be shocked by your appearance. You may be embarrassed by the long, unkempt hair and visible roots, or the shabby skin and scraggly beard. Get on with the clothing shopping and see if there’s a salon nearby. They take walk-ins.
4. Never shop in desperation. Unless you’re young, gorgeous and slim and a perfect size, you may wind up tired and depressed. Even young, slim, gorgeous people who are a perfect size something have challenges finding things that fit just right or look good on them. If you have important events coming up, leave plenty of time to find what you need for them. Part of the game is to keep things in your closet that you can use for multiple occasions. I bought a snazzy, dramatic jacket two years ago that I knew would stay in my closet for a long time, but which I would eventually be REALLY glad I obtained. When the day came when I needed something snazzy and dramatic, I was so grateful I could just reach for that jacket. Bam. If you know your life, you have a sense of what kinds of clothing you really need.
5. TRY IT ON. Nothing looks alive on a hanger. TRY IT ON. You do not know until you do.
6. Avoid cheap fabrics and cheap color dye lots. High-priced fashion is rife with both. Don’t be taken by a label. A lot of expensive designer stuff is made like garbage and looks it.
7. Bring the right shoes with you when making an important purchase such as a suit or cocktail dress.
It will help so much.
8. If you consistently have good luck with one store, make that your store. You’re not imagining things: certain buyers will appeal to your aesthetic. Certain designers and clothing lines will work much better for your body type.
9. Do the Carl D. Weinstein fit test: Can you button it? Can you raise your hands over your head? Can you sit comfortably in it, and bend over in it? How does it look from the back? Ask someone to watch you move in it. Is it lined? If it is lined, is the lining sewn in straight? Are the hems and seams strong? If it requires dry cleaning are you still willing to care for it? Are the buttons all there? Are they sewn on securely (if not, and the garment is otherwise well-made and well-priced, I take it to the tailor immediately and have the buttons re-sewn).
10. Finally, this: assembling your wardrobe is WORK. If shopping for ministry clothing isn’t fun and easy, that’s not because you’re doing something wrong. It’s because putting together a professional look for yourself is important and requires a lot of thought and legwork. As you learn your body, your price range, your stores, your designers (or manufacturers), your fit issues, your best sartorial successes and your most disappointing failures, it gets easier.
Happy shopping, dear ones!
I hate shopping and spent most of my working life in jeans and t-shirts. I am very lucky to have a dear friend who is not only completely honest with me on what looks good and what doesn’t. It also helps that she now owns a higher end consignment shop and pulls things as they come in for me to try on. Between her and your blog, I finally feel put together and grownup!
I used to turn up my nose at Goodwill and Salvation Army for clothes shopping but no more! One of the best dressed women I know (and the wife of a minister) buys almost all her clothes there and now so do I. People abandon brand name sweaters, jackets, coats, etc. for whatever reason and you can buy great stuff for a pittance as long as you don’t mind that someone else has worn it before you. Our local “Sally’s Boutique” (aka Salv. Army) has a half-price “Wacky Wednesday” when most everything, yes, even cashmere sweaters, are $3. Can’t beat that. [You sure can’t! If I was a standard size I wouldn’t go anywhere else. People purchase so many clothes these days, and shift sizes so frequently, it’s highly unlikely that any one of us couldn’t find plenty of good options in the racks of the consignment, thrift stores and charity shops. People can hardly unload all their clothes these days, they’ve got so much of it. – PB]