Beauty Tips for Ministers

Personal Jewelry Does Not Belong On Vestments

Darlings?

May we talk for just a wee moment? I know it’s the Monday after Easter and you’re weary. I, too. And yet I feel the urgent need to say this before someone else gets it into his or her head to adorn his or her cassock with a big butterfly pin or something: WE DO NOT WEAR PERSONAL JEWELRY ON OUR VESTMENTS. EVER.

I will now pick my jaw up off the floor where it fell last night when I heard that a lovely seminarian adorned her robe with a large broach on Easter Sunday, and wish you all a beautiful and blessed day.

PeaceBang’s Easter Joy

Darlings,
I brim with happiness to share with you the news that SweetieBang and I will be bringing home our new baby on Tuesday.
Read all about him here.

The Exquisite Decorum of the Episcopal Good Friday Service

No one does liturgy like the Piskies. They have it DOWN: decorum, demeanor, graceful transitions from element to element, gracious and confident administration of the sacraments. I attended a Maundy Thursday service at a liberal Christian church in Boston last night and Good Friday at the Cathedral Church in Boston. I love the people who presided at both services, but let me just say this:
liturgically-oriented Unitarian Universalists and other Free Church folk, hear me: attend worship with the Episcopalians and see how it’s done, please. I love you dearly but I beg of you. Go thou and study.

I attended today’s service with a friend and his comment at the end of everything was “They are better than anyone else at making a space for the Mystery.” And I said, “I couldn’t agree with you more, but that Acolyte totally should not have been wearing Merrell Jungle Mocs with white socks under her robe.”

Everything else was glorious.

Easter You

Hello darlings,
It’s 12:35 and SweetieBang and I are still up — I just put finishing touches on my Easter Order of Service and he’s staring intently at the computer screen reading about dog obedience training. The cat is curled in a cat loaf on the arm of the couch. All is pretty well in our little world and I’m looking forward to attending Maundy Thursday and Good Friday services over the next days.

I said attending, and aren’t I the lucky one? It is not my congregation’s tradition to offer either of these services, so I get to be a worshiper this Holy Week before joining with my own dearly beloveds for Easter morning at my own congregation.

But I am thinking of those of you who will be very much on the run over the next few days and I simply want to say, please take care of your good selves. Please eat well, stay hydrated, wash your hands often, rest as much as you are able between public appearances, keep a fresh hankie on you at all times, be careful shaving (gents) and ladies, bring an extra pair of pantyhose for an emergency and a comfy pair of slippers to church to slip on in the privacy of your study.

Scrub under your nails every night, wash your face well and with care, don’t over-do the caffeine (let the Holy Spirit do more and you won’t need so much java), keep your hair clean and neat, and tuck a lip balm into your pocket. When you get a moment in the sacristy, sit up in a chair and take ten slow, deep breaths. Rub your hands together to warm them and cup them over your eyes. Take your vitamins. Shine your shoes. Check yourself in the mirror before you go out to wash feet tomorrow night. Even servant leaders don’t want to have spinach stuck between their teeth.

Remember that PeaceBang loves you, is praying for your strength and stamina during this very challenging week, and knows that you will bring the beauty and grace of God to all those you encounter.

You are the resurrection and the life! Hallelujah, pigeons!

Dr. Scholl Crazy Shoes

Ardent West Coast PeaceBanger E.H. alerted me to these truly crazy Dr. Scholl sandal/Crocs/wedges and I’m just totally fascinated by how fabulously ugly and wonderful they are.

If they’re as comfortable as they look, I have to have a pair. In orange or turquoise. Just for perversity’s sake.

She Searches In Vain For Mary Jane(s)

Born Mary Jane. Just ugly. No one needs hobbit feet. Avoid.

Dansko Mary Jane. Comfy. Frumpy.

El Naturalista Mary Jane. El Frumperino. What are you going to wear these with other than a hempen hippie skirt? No.

Softwalk Mary Jane. Keep soft walking by these and find something less schoolmarmish. That is one unflattering strap there.

Pumpkins, flats are very in style right now. Why not try some of those, even in bright hues? Some of them don’t have much support - skip those and find some that do. Add a little gel insert by Dr. Scholl and voila, comfort and professional polish!